EXERCISE FOR POTENCY
Exercise can boost potency by increasing your sense of well-being and your ability to handle stress. It also helps keep your arteries functioning well. So it’s important that you exercise regularly. Your doctor can help you plan an exercise program that will be safe and beneficial.
Ask him to focus on aerobic exercise—steady exercise over a prolonged period of time which increases your heart rate and makes your body produce more HDLs. Many activities qualify as aerobic exercise, including jogging, bicycling and walking briskly. To be really helpful, however, most of these exercises need to be done for 20 to 30 minutes at a time, at least three times a week. You don’t need to start out at this pace. Begin slowly and work your way up gradually. Exercise activities with a lot of stops and starts, such as handball, tennis and weight lifting, won’t do your arteries as much good as a less strenuous, but continuous workout. The key is to get your heart rate up to 80 percent of its maximum, and keep it there for 12 to 15 minutes. Ask your doctor what your maximum heart rate should be. Then, when you exercise, stop periodically to check your pulse to see what your rate is.
Faithfully following an exercise program for several months also tends to lower your blood pressure. Doctors know that high blood pressure is a major cause of clogged arteries, so lowering your blood pressure can help your arteries, your heart—and your erections.
Sometimes men who enjoy exercise believe that all they have to do to protect their health and their potency is work Out. Some people believe in the tooth fairy, too. The truth is that all the other elements of the potency program—diet, normal weight, normal blood pressure, no smoking and moderate use of alcohol, if any—are essential, too. If you jog five miles and then reward yourself with a double cheeseburger and fries, followed by a cigarette, your arteries are still susceptible to trouble.
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SURGICAL SOLUTION:IMPLANTS FOR IMPROVING POTENCY
An implant will not change your personality. It will not make you the most popular guy on the block. It can’t be counted on to save a failing marriage.
Having an implant does not, by itself, make you feel aroused. What causes you to feel desire before surgery should have the same effect after the operation. By the same token, if you rarely feel sexual desire before getting an implant, that’s unlikely to change.
Implants are not magic problem-solvers. The prosthesis will not change lifelong sexual patterns. If you rarely had sex before your erection problem developed, the operation will not turn you into a sexual superman. By itself, an implant will not increase your sexual appetite or desire. The prosthesis doesn’t change behavior; it just enables you to have an erection and makes intercourse possible.
Implants produce a simulated erection which, although close in appearance to a natural erection, is not identical. The implants are placed in the corpora cavernosa (those two cylinders which run parallel along the length of the penis, and, in a natural erection, fill up with blood). The head of the penis, which is part of a separate and much more delicate area called the corpus spongiosum, does not become erect with any of the implants. And it’s not likely that a model with such a feature will be developed, because of this area’s small size, irregular shape and closeness to the urethra.
The implant erection usually is not quite as wide or as long as a naturally produced erection. An implant won’t increase the size of a man’s penis.
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CHOOSE THE RIGHT DOCTOR: WARNING SIGNS
Sometimes the best way to tell if you’ve found a professional who may be able to help is by what he or she does not do. The following are some warning signs. We suggest that you look elsewhere for your care if your doctor does any of the following things:
• He refuses or is unwilling to have your partner involved in diagnosis and treatment.
• He ignores your sexual problem or tries to change the subject every time you bring it up.
• He tells you to adjust to life without sex, or tells you that sex isn’t important.
• He fails to take a complete medical history specifically aimed at diagnosing impotence.
• He makes any automatic, unfounded assumptions about the cause of your problem. If your doctor tells you without giving you a thorough evaluation that your erection problems are caused by psychological difficulties or that you have a problem just because you’ve been working too hard, run, don’t walk, out of that office. Generally speaking, no one can assume the cause of your problem without a thorough evaluation specifically focused on your potency problem. Don’t let a well meaning but ignorant professional dissuade you from seeking all the help you need.
• He can’t tell you the success rates and the dangers of various treatments.
• He is quick to tell you, «If this treatment doesn’t work, nothing will!» If you hear this, bolt for the door! No knowledgeable professional will put you under such wholly uncalled-for stress. There are almost always alternative treatments that will help. If you decide on a particular course of action, find out about alternatives if your first attempt at a solution (preferably the least expensive and least complicated treatment) doesn’t work.
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POTENCY PROBLEMS: HOW WOMEN REACT
Women have many of the same fears as men. And a wife or lover may be afraid that by talking about the problem she’ll find out that she is the problem—that she’s doing something that turns him off. And she may fear finding out that her husband does fine with other women. She also may be afraid that his health is the problem; she may resist talking about the difficulty hoping it will «cure» itself, so she’ll know he is physically okay And some women want to protect their husband’s feelings Sensing their partner’s reluctance to talk, they avoid the topic They don’t want to, as one woman says, «make him feel an^ worse than he already does.»
Our research indicates that women react to erection problems in a wide variety of ways. In many cases we looked at, the way a woman responded appeared to be greatly influence by the way she and her husband normally communicated. The more reassurance and love that was available on both sides and the more both were involved in solving the problem, the more manageable the sexual difficulty was. When there was less communication there was more opportunity for hurt feelings, self-doubt, blame and anger to fester—and erupt.
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AFTER ED (ERECTILE DISFUNCTION): A NEW BEGINNING
Jack’s reaction is far from unique. In fact, I’ve seen men, tortured by a long history of erectile dysfunction, suddenly change after taking the medication. With the restoration of a fulfilling sex life, patients have become calmer, happier, and more optimistic about their ability to fully engage in all the aspects of their personal relationships.
One patient described it to me this way: «For the first time in three years, I was able to make love without feeling that I had to totally control the situation from start to finish. We could both relax, take our time, and enjoy being with each other. It’s what sex should be.»
Often, regaining erectile function gives men the confidence to enjoy other sexual activities, including prolonged foreplay, sensate touch, oral gratification, and erotic role playing. It allows them to receive pleasure more readily, and share that excitement with their partner. With the pill there is no longer any need to restrict sexual activity. Men and women can now enjoy the full repertoire of sexual expression. The magic of the medication is that it allows sex to regain its natural rhythm.
Then, too, there are those men who regard their restored function as a second chance. This time, they want to make everything as good as it can be, and share optimally with their partners on every level. To me, they express a deep sense of appreciation and gratitude—especially those who have experienced ED for long periods of time. Such patients take nothing for granted, and particularly not where their relationships are concerned. They are willing, indeed eager, to examine their feelings in ways they couldn’t before because they were preoccupied with their physical states. The result, very often, is two people who are much happier. Having seen the transformative effects of the drug, the partners of these men are delighted with the changes that affect both of them.
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